Interview with a difficult character

So. Barb told me in a comment from my last poast that it was a good idea if I do a writing excercise of a conversation between me and my difficult character. So I did it interview-style and I had a lot of fun writing it. So here, for your reading pleasure, is the finished product:

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Me: “Okay Mckayla. You’re really frustrating me.”

Mckayla: “Yeah? Well you’re no help. Put me in something already!”

Me: “I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.”

Mckayla: “You want to know what I want? Romance, action, comedy, and please, a decent wardrobe.”

Me: “Hey I’m the author here. I make the decisions.”

Mckayla: “Says who?”

Me: “And where on earth did you get that sense of irony? I didn’t give you irony!”

Mckayla: “You didn’t give me it. However, you did give me a cat. How cliché!”

Me: “Then where did you get it?”

Mckayla: “Found it.”

Me: “Where?”

Mckayla examines her fingernails and ignores my question.

Me: “I’m not above spanking you,” I warn.

Mckayla: “You would spank me?”

Me: “Yes. I have ultimate power in this relationship.”

Mckayla: “I know you’ve been thinking about putting me in a Harry Potter fanfic. You’d be giving me a wand. Talk about ultimate power...”

Me: “Okay, so maybe that’s a bad idea. Maybe I should put you in another story and then KILL YOU.”

Mckayla: “You wouldn’t!”

Me: “I would. In the first chapter. No character development, no good scenes, no boyfriend...” I say offhandedly.

Mckayla plops down on a poofy chair.

Mckayla: “You’d think I’d have found a better author to write me by now.”

Me: “Hmm... What was that? Do I hear an attitude coming from you?”

Mckayla: “No... MOM.”

Me: “And was that sarcasm?”

Mckayla: “No.”

Me: “Then what was it?”

Mckayla: “Nothing, already!”

Me: “I swear that I can hear the unsaid words of ‘You’re ruining my life!’”

Mckayla: “Why would I say that since I have no life.”

Me: “You could. If you were a little nicer to me I might give you one.”

Mckayla sighs and rolls her eyes.

Me: “Just answer my questions, Mckayla. Nicely and with limited sarcasm please.”

Mckayla: “Fine. Shoot.”

Me: “Would you mind if I put you in a fanfic?”

Mckayla: “Shouldn’t you know that already?”

Me: “Limited. Sarcasm. Please.”

Mckayla: “No, I wouldn’t mind. In fact, I feel like I could do well in that Harry Potter genre.”

Me: “Good! Next question. How old are you?”

Mckayla: “I’m sixteen. And before you ask, my birthday is December 18.”

Me: “Okaaay... Next question: How many brothers and sisters do you have, and what are their names and ages?”

Mckayla: “I have four brothers. Daniel, Roderick, Peter, and Theodore, aged 14, 10 and 7. Peter and Ted are identical twins. No sisters... Unfortunately.”

I write all of this down.

Me: “Okay, and your parents?”

Mckayla: “Ted and Adrienne. They forbid me to tell you their ages.”

Me: “Same with my mom.” We both giggle. “Okay, so what are your favorite things to do?”

Mckayla: “I really like art. I can paint things and they practically come to life.”

Me: “And since you are going to be in Hogwarts, what is your favorite subject there?”

Mckayla: “Charms or transfiguration. I love both of them.”

Me: “Okay. So... I guess this is all I need from you right now. You can go back to wherever you were hiding before I summoned you!”

Mckayla: “Sweet! See ya in Vegas!”

Me: “Bye! ...Wait. Vegas? Let me come!!”