Dear Lily

Dear Lily, 

At the moment, you are upstairs napping, though I have a feeling it won't be for that much longer. These days you nap like a champ... just not for too long. Except for last week when we were a house full of sick people, (darn stomach bug Emma brought home from daycare!) you refuse to sleep for longer than about an hour and twenty minutes. But that's really alright, because two shorter naps in the day mean one catnap in the early evening, and usually you catnap on me. 

You must know that I looked after your big sister Emma when she was your age. At first it was hard for me to not make comparisons between the two of you. After all, you look just like her... but your stunning good looks are about where the similarities end. You are more active, more impatient, happier, fatter, stronger, more talkative, and more stubborn than your big sister. You will give her hell, and I will do my best to warn her when she gets a little older. 

Baby, I will never forget the first time you smiled when I walked in the front door. I will never forget the way you used to get this big silly grin on your face after you sneezed, as if you were saying "Did you hear that NOISE I just made?!" I will never forget the way you never failed to get your leg stuck in your crib during naptime. 

I will never forget the first time I figured out that I could throw some towels in the dryer and sit you in front of it to distract you. I'll never forget the first time you clapped for me, or waved at me, or stuck your tongue out at me. I'll never forget the first time I took you to the park and put you in a swing. You could have swung for hours, just like your sister.

Miss Lily, I love your sister Emma very much. I love her with all my heart, and could never imagine my life without her in it (nor my car without her carseat, though apparently I'll have to give that back!) But Lily, know that you have irrevocably squeezed yourself into my heart too, with every squeal, every smile, and every sneeze. 

I printed out some of my favorite photos of you and Emma and put them on my wall. Even though I won't see you every day anymore, I will always have you in my home, and in my heart.

P.S. Be nice to your sister, please. She knows how to throw a really good tantrum! 

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Today is my last day on the job. I wrote Emma a note three years ago when I finished looking after her that first summer, and so I thought I would do the same today.

There will be tears when I leave. There are always tears when I leave... but I know that it won't be for long. These girls, this family, will have me in their life (whether they want it or not!) I've warned them that they may have to shove me out of their house.

Lastly, for your viewing entertainment, please enjoy this video below of Lily trying so hard to crawl, and being adorable in the process.

Subject Totally Predictable

So I am in the midst of moving out of my college apartment... so instead of blogging about that, I thought I'd blog about Emma & Lily. (Patience, a blog about my new place will be coming soon enough!)

I don't know if you know this, but they're my favorite girls!

Miss Emma, who is the Queen of all Busy Bees around. 

And Miss Lily, who is the Queen of Vomiting All Over Me and Still Being Precious.

She will be 7 months old this week, on Thursday to be precise. She has two teeth, loves to leave bite marks, and is the smiliest of all baby girls.

Except when she's not smiley. I love crying baby shots, but I mostly am sharing this one with you because LOOK! TEETH! 

Careful, she's a biter!

Existential Crisis

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about how I have nothing to blog about. 

Which is absolutely untrue, when I step back and give myself a reality check: I have an awesome job, I'm in this crazy (very bloggable) transitional phase in my life, I'm moving in a week, I'm applying for jobs... but when I open the blogger post page, my fingers hover over the keyboard and I get stuck.

Why have I been experiencing such writer's block?

I have a hard time talking about things that aren't going well in my life. Don't get me wrong, nothing is going horribly awry right now, it often feels like nothing is going wonderfully right, either. I'm in a post-graduation rut that I can't seem to climb out of, and as August approaches, it's not getting easier. I think August, especially the end of the month when I'm not going back to school, will be a tough time. I cannot remember the last time I did not return to school in August.

I've been going to school and measuring my worth by my academic successes (and failures) for so long that I am suffering some serious existential drama: Who am I? Who am I without school, without grades? Am I actually equipped for the real world? 

Logically, I know that many people have gone through this exact thing. I am not special. But I sure feel special, and alone. 

And so I try not to think about it too much. I try to deal with it in microscopic portions, telling myself that it will all work out in my favor, but it won't work itself out if I sit on my rear and panic.

Baby steps. With Mom's help, over the weekend I applied to several jobs. In a week, I'm moving into a new apartment, which will hopefully help my transition away from school (mentally and geographically!) Also next week, I'm going to the beach for a few days! In the meantime, I'm packing up one apartment and ridding myself of a great deal of clutter. 

And in the meantime, I'm hanging out with this adorable, sweet baby girl. 

Lily not only has one tooth now, but two! And she is trying out her consonants and sounds. Her favorite word last week was "Ma", but this morning she was saying "Ni" a lot, which tells me that she's obviously joined the ranks of the Knights who say Ni! over the weekend.

It feels good to write about my thoughts. I'll try and keep this in mind over the next few weeks and months. I would also appreciate any advice you beautiful readers might have for me! 

Adorable baby is adorable

This post is brought to you by the letter I, for Instagram. Alternatively, it is brought to you by the letter H for Hipster.   

So I don't know if you guys remember, but I hang out with Lily a lot these days. She is extraordinarily photogenic, and most of the time I can't help myself.

This one is my phone background right now.

Just like her big sister, Lily LOVES to swing! 

Today, I'm looking after Lily at her grandmother's apartment downtown because of things happening at her house. This place is swanky, and also has one helluva view! 

Step into my office... 

I'll just stay here forever, shall I?

Lily Tells a Story

Once upon a time in a land far, far away, there was a beautiful princess. 

She was the most beautiful, smiley, and drooly girl around. 

She loved to stick out her tongue, and bounce in her jumperoo.

She loved to laugh and jump and thought her dog was the funniest creature in the land. She also loved her older sister, the big girl princess.

One day, she was doing all of her favorite things, but suddenly, she realized she was tired! She yawned and yawned... 

But that didn't stop her from continuing to smile and bounce.

At least... until... 

The yawns struck again!! 

The princess became very unhappy. She didn't want to be in her jumperoo anymore!

She was tired. She wanted to eat, and she wanted to take a nap in her princess bed.

Wish granted! But now that she'd been fed... 

She decided to just snack on her toes.

New News, New Toys and Post #700!

So yesterday, I found my next apartment! Katie, my stepsister, and I will be moving in on the 30th of July, so plenty of time between now and then. Still super excited, though... it's a step up from where I'm living now, that's for sure! 

Also, I'd like to take a moment and mention that this is my seven hundredth post! Can you believe that even with how often I don't blog I've still managed to write 700? Go figure! Let's celebrate with a photo montage, thanks to my NEW TOY:

Hellllloooooo Fancy Camera!

It's a Nikon D3100, and it is shiny and new and I love it. I have two lenses and I see myself being very happy with it!

Fancy Camera is watching you...

I celebrated my purchase by taking a walk around campus to see what it could do! Sunday evening means that the campus was pretty empty, so mostly I found flowers and plants and things to photograph!

It doesn't look all that far away, but I was unreasonably far. I love my zoom! 

Turtle pond :)

There were some adorable boys who were racing with their dad around the main mall. Cute! 

Lonely bicycles!

I realized there is a lot of floral color around campus, even during summer! How lovely!

Baby Lily

You guys have met Lily before. She's grown just a little since you guys last saw her, even since last time I saw her in March.

My job for the summer is just about the same as it was three years ago when I looked after Emma every day. Except this time, I get Emma once a week (aww...) and Lily five times a week! 

I've been looking after this little munchkin for a week now, so I am going to lay down some things about her. Just so you guys can get a better impression. You know, get to know her a little.

Lily is five months old, and looks Lily looks just like her sister (except she's got some really adorable baby pudge going on).  Same bald head... same big, blue eyes, same face. 

Except her head's a lot smaller! 

Lily likes to do a lot of things. She likes to wiggle. Although she did the stomach to back flop once for me, she hasn't really gotten more mobile than pitching her legs into the carpet and pushing. These have earned her the nicknames: Wiggles McGee and Scootch McGoo.

Lily LOVES to smile and laugh! She also loves to see herself in the forward-facing camera on my phone. 

Totally toofless! 

Lily loves to sleep, too. She sometimes has a hard time getting there and accepting that it is naptime, but once she's down, she's out!

What a beautiful blanket, too!

And Lily, like her big sister, LOVES to eat! She occasionally will hold her own bottle, but mostly she makes me do it. Of course I'm only happy to oblige.

But above all, Lily likes to chew on things. And drool all over them... can you imagine anything more fun than to spend your day snacking on your fingers and toes? (Rhetorical question!)

I know Lily can't! 

Other things Lily loves are watching tv with me (I've been watching a lot of Discovery Channel documentaries lately, and she really likes watching the animals) and listening to me read. I am working my way through the Sherlock Holmes stories right now, so since I want to read, I read aloud. She likes Sherlock, and I like practicing character voices. She also likes it when I sing to her - this week it's been "Once Upon a Dream" from Disney's Sleeping Beauty.

Most of the time I call Lily "Boo" partly because it's a popular nickname, but partly because she reminds me of the little girl named "Boo" in Monsters, Inc. (a Pixar movie).  All Boo does is laugh at the monsters in the movie, just like Lily is always giggling and smiling.

Emma stays home with me once a week and keeps me very busy. One of her favorite games is "bedtime", where she makes me "go to sleep" with her on the couch, and then she waits until she can no longer stand it (usually about fifteen seconds) at which point she cries "Oh! Is it morning already!" and makes me stand up and get all of her toys out of their little nests. Then we put them back in the nests and the whole thing starts again. 

Emma is a busy girl. She's always up to something.

And Emma made me the BEST present for my graduation! It's a painting... and yes, it is hanging on my fridge.

Enough baby stuff for now. Upward and onward... to victory! (And to the rest of the summer!)