Already, I am pretty sick of the question which immediately follows anyone asking, "What are you studying?"
"What do you want to do with that?"
The answer I feed to people (after they often prompt me with, "Teach?") is, "I'd like to go into publishing. I'd like to be an editor. I love red pens!"
This usually elicits a giggle or a comment resembling "Wow" or any of its derivatives, and then we move forward with our conversation. The unfortunate thing is that, more and more I find myself wanting to shout, "Whatever the hell I want to do with my English degree! What did you do with yours, huh? Anything that applies to what you do now, eh?"
This immature response is something I avoid actually saying, of course... but it sure doesn't get any easier every time I hear that dumb question.
I understand just as well as anyone else that the question inevitably comes from a natural desire to be polite and have good conversation. It's a legitimate question... however, it doesn't make it any less annoying. I remember having similar frustrations when I was a senior in high school in regards to: "What do you want to study?" and "Where do you want to go to college?" I happily answered, but grew more and more weary of that by May. Now that I'm close to finishing, nobody wants to know what I've learned, just how I'll use it.
Just once, I'd like to be asked: "Oh, you're an English major? What do you think about Austen's use of irony in her books?" or "Can you analyze this for me?" Even, "English majors are my favorite! Here, have all the jobs!"
(A girl can dream, right?)
The paralyzing fear that gripped me then grips me again now: Do I know what I want to do? Am I actually any good at it? Have the last four years been worth anything? I'm leaving with a piece of paper and what's in my brain... is that enough?
It probably is enough, if I want it to be. It's just really scary at this point, seeing the top of the hill and wondering if I'll ever crest it.
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/endrant
I apologize for the rant. It's been on my mind all night/all week/all summer, particularly because of one of my classes. I'll be blogging about my classes soon, which all seem pretty cool so far. And they come with practical application to boot!
In other news, I'm changing the name of the blog again, this time to "three by five". Moving forward into a new frame of mind and phase of life, it's not always just one of those days for me anymore... For a description of what the new title means, click this link. For the short explanation, I offer you this: I wish you were here with me, and that I didn't have to share with you my life through words and pictures. But for now, it'll have to do.
In other super happy funtime news, we won the game this weekend! Hook 'em!
